Story of your name.

"I have always found the mystical side of Judiasm, the stories and the concepts, fascinating. . The following suggests that, from the time of birth, the spiritual aspect of the child has been cultivated and that at some unconscious level we are aware of spiritual secrets we have otherwise forgotten. The spiritual truth lies beneath the surface, if only we will seek it out.
According to The Zohar, there is an angel, Lailah; the angel of conception, who waits, and at the appropriate time brings the soul of the yet-to-be-born child to its parents. In Jewish legend, she is also the angel of the Night. The soul and body of man are united in this way.
When the time has come for a man and his wife to conceive a child, God directs Lailah to seek out a certain soul hidden in the Garden of Eden, and command it to enter a drop of semen. At first the soul refuses as it still remembers the pain of being born, and it prefers to remain pure. Nonetheless, Lailah compels the soul to obey, and that is when God pronounces what the fate of that sperm will be...whether male or female, strong or weak, rich or poor, and so on. Then the angel turns around and places the soul in the womb of the mother.
While the infant grows in the womb, Lailah places a lighted candle at the head of the unborn infant, so it can see from one end of the world to the other, as it is said, 'His lamp shone above my head, and by His light I walked through darkness'.
For nine months, Lailah watches over the unborn, teaching it the entire Torah as well as the history of its soul. Before the is born, it is given an oath to keep its soul pure. Then Lailah accompanies the child into the Garden of Eden, and shows it the righteous ones. So too does Lailah lead the child to the netherworld and shows it the punishments of Gehenna.
But when the time has come to be born, Lailah extinguishes the lamp, and brings forth the child into the world. The instant the child emerges, she lightly strikes the newborn above the lip, causing it to cry out. And at that very moment, the infant forgets all it has learned.
This is the origin of the mark on the upper lip, which everyone bears. Indeed, Lailah is a guardian angel, who watches over that child all of its days. And when the time has come to take leave of this world, it is Lailah who appears and says, “Do you not recognize me? The time of your departure has come. I have come to take you from this world.”
Thereupon Lailah leads him to the World to Come, where he or she has an account before God, and is accordingly judged."

http://secretsofthenight-mxtodis123.blogspot.com/2011/11/lailah-angel-of-conception.html


While pregnant with you, I felt that this angel was with me at all times and that ultimately I unconsciously named you after her. Before having you I had visions, visions of life and death. I knew when people would conceive and when babies would be born - the specific day. I saw visions of my head of accidents and I got feelings of death and knew someone was going to die right before they did. I came to believe she was with me and she helped bring me you.

Explaining you at age 4.

Dear Lailah,

You are a miracle in my life. You are the most beautiful little girl. I could not even ask for anything more.

You are  4! Four years old already. You are learning so so so much ! You're a little sponge.

You are amazing. You are so intelligent and such a little leader !

Every song is your favorite at this age.. and if it's not your favorite, it must be your daddys favorite !

You're just starting to understand sarcasm and you have picked up on how to use it quiet well. :p

You love to make people laugh, you're quite the entertainer.

I like to say that everyone is your friend and you are nobody's, because you are the leader in the group. You don't depend on having friends for your happiness, you just depend on you. :] 

You love dancing and being silly, you can do a pretty mean cartwheel lol.

You say the funniest things where I just can't help but record you and show you off!

I don't know what I would do or where I would be without you in my life.

Whenever I'm not with you, I'm talking about you. I'm talking about how extremely blessed I had gotten for you to enter my life and have chosen me as your mommy.

I got so lucky to have such a well behaved and well mannered little girl. 

Everyday you amaze me with the things you do and say, I can not help but smile and be so proud of you!

I am blessed to be your mommy and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Sometimes I wish more for you, I wish I could be more for you.

But all I can do is work towards being everything I know you deserve from me.

I'm in school and I'm putting our life together.

I recently promised you that one day I will buy us a house.

You will remind me everyday, I know you will. :]

You are pure innocence and your innocence drives my motivation to make something of myself. That way, one day.. you can become an amazing grown women who makes great choices for her own life.

I love you, I love you more than imaginable... 

Thank you, for being in my life. <3